Thursday, January 14, 2010

Bay Area Husker ENews 1/7/2010

Hey Bay Area Husker Fans!

30,000 cheering Husker fans couldn't have cared less that it was a drizzly chilly evening in Qualcom Stadium in San Diego. What a great way to cap off the season! The most amazing statistic I remember from the game was that our defense held Arizona (runner up in the Pac 10) to only 35-40 total yards until midway into the 4th quarter when their last drive against 2nd and 3rd string Husker players netted them enough yards to top 100 for the game. Thats also when the defensive leadership decided that they weren't going to let the 'Cats get a cheap one and Suh and the gang stopped them cold. Coach Pelini's speech as he accepted the tropy was inspiring and provided the players and the fans with a deja vu memory of glory past as he stated "Thanks to all of our great fans for coming out and supporting us here ... I just want to say that Nebraska's back, and we're here to stay,". Lots of good reading about the game below.

One San Diego sportswriter had a funny spin on the game. He wrote that Arizona spent over $30,000 for new all-white uniforms with throwback all-white helmets. He then said they would have saved a lot of money and been better off just buying white flags...had to chuckle over that one!

And check out our women's basketball team! They are undefeated and ranked in the top 12. They crushed the Vermont Catamounts on Monday night, who were one of only a handful of undefeated teams in the country until their contest with the Huskers. And the men's BB team is doing great too. They are 12-3 including a win over USC last month. Both teams start Big 12 play this Saturday.

I also included a cute piece of winter humor at the end of the email (Thanks Shari).

Go Big Red!

Carl

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HUSKERS WHITEWASH WILDCATS IN HOLIDAY BOWL...

San Diego, Calif. - In one of Nebraska's most dominant bowl performances in its illustrious bowl history, the No. 20 Cornhuskers registered their first-ever bowl shutout with a 33-0 whitewashing of Arizona in the 2009 Pacific Life Holiday Bowl on Wednesday night at Qualcomm Stadium.

With the victory, Nebraska finished the season 10-4 with six wins in its last seven games with the lone loss coming by one point in the final second to No. 2 and unbeaten Texas in the Big 12 Championship Game on Dec. 5 in Arlington, Texas. The Huskers notched their first 10-win season since 2003, while dropping the No. 22 Wildcats to 8-5 on the year.

Nebraska's 33-point victory margin was its largest in a bowl game since a 49-point win (66-17) over Northwestern in the 2000 Alamo Bowl. It also challenged a 39-point (45-6) win over Georgia in the 1969 Sun Bowl, a 38-point win over Florida in the 1996 Fiesta Bowl and a 34-point victory (40-6) over Notre Dame in the 1973 Orange Bowl.

Led by All-American defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh and Holiday Bowl Defensive MVP Matt O'Hanlon, the performance of Nebraska's Blackshirts was near perfection, surrendering just 109 total offense yards by the Wildcats. Arizona managed just 63 rushing yards, 46 yards passing and six first downs.

The only serious scoring threat Arizona mounted all night came on its final drive, when the Wildcats accounted for 72 of their 109 yards and nearly one-fourth of their time of possession for the game. Keola Antolin's 36-yard rush on the drive accounted for one-third of U of A's offense for the game. But on 4th-and-3 at the NU 8, NU's P.J. Smith ended the Wildcat threat with a breakup on Arizona's final play to preserve the first shutout in the 14-year history of Big 12 Conference football.

In arguably their best all-around effort of the season, the Huskers used more than just defense to dominate the Wildcats.

An efficient and balanced offense finished with 396 total yards, including 223 rushing yards and 173 passing yards. NU rolled up 22 first downs, while surrendering just six to the Wildcats, with three of those on their final drive of the game. The Huskers also won the time of possession battle by an overwhelming margin, 38:12-21:48.

As usual, Omaha natives Alex Henery and Niles Paul also provided Nebraska with huge advantages on special teams, as Henery went 4-for-4 on field goal attempts, and punted four times while burying the Wildcats inside their own 20 three times. Paul, who went on to earn Holiday Bowl Offensive MVP honors, added a 49-yard kickoff return and three punt returns for a total of 45 yards to set the Huskers up with excellent field position throughout the night.

Paul added one carry for 20 yards and capped the Big Red's big finale to the season with a Nebraska bowl-game record 74-yard touchdown reception in the third quarter. It was also Nebraska's longest play from scrimmage this season. The junior wide receiver finished the game with four receptions for 123 yards and accounted for 237 all-purpose yards to power the Husker offense.

Coach Bo Pelini, who improved to 3-0 as NU's head coach in bowl games, showed his pride in his Huskers' performance when he accepted the Holiday Bowl and addressed the crowd by saying: "Thanks to all of our great fans for coming out and supporting us here...Nebraska's back, and we're here to stay."

The Blackshirts' impenetrable defense allowed the Wildcats just 21 first-half snaps, with none coming on the Husker half of the field. While the defense was dominating, the offense methodically dissected the Arizona defense throughout the game, building a 10-0 first-quarter lead and a 23-0 halftime margin. Nebraska's lead grew to 33-0 after three quarters.

For the Blackshirts, it was their first shutout since a 55-0 blanking of Louisiana-Lafayette on Sept. 26. It also marked the fourth time this season the Big Red held an opponent out of the end zone.

The Blackshirts flexed their muscles just seconds after the opening kickoff, forcing a pair of incompletions by U of A quarterback Nick Foles to set up a 3rd-and-10. Foles tested Nebraska's outstanding secondary, and O'Hanlon made the Wildcats pay by hauling in his sixth interception of the season and returning it 37 yards.

O'Hanlon's big play set up Zac Lee's four-yard touchdown run two plays later to give Nebraska a quick 7-0 lead just 1:15 into the game. That score proved to be more than enough for Nebraska's defense, but the offense kept rolling for the Huskers. Lee finished the night with 65 rushing yards on 18 carries including the score, while adding 173 passing yards and another score while completing 13-of-23 attempts.

Five minutes later, Henery connected on a 47-yard field goal to cap a seven-play, 31-yard drive to push NU's lead to 10-0.

The Husker offense struck again on its opening drive of the second quarter, covering 82 yards on seven plays capped by freshman I-back Rex Burkhead's five-yard scoring run untouched into the end zone with 11:57 left in the half. Burkhead finished a solid game with 89 yards on 17 carries, while adding two receptions for 14 yards.

Henery pushed NU's lead to 20-0 with a 50-yard field goal with 8:25 left in the half, before capping a 12-play, 44-yard drive with a 41-yard field with 35 seconds left in the opening half.

Nebraska carried its 23-0 lead into the locker room at halftime, and Henery connected on his fourth field goal five minutes later to make it 26-0. Henery's field goal, his 24th in 28 attempts this season, capped an 11-play, 41-yard march for the Huskers.

Paul then provided the exclamation point for the Husker offense with his 74-yard touchdown reception from Lee with 3:39 left in the third quarter. Paul's fourth scoring catch of the year pushed his season totals to 40 receptions for 796 yards - the fifth-best receiving yardage total in school history.

Scoring Summary

Final: #20 Nebraska 33, #22 Arizona 0

First Quarter (NU, 10-0)
NU - 13:45 - Zac Lee 4 run (Alex Henery kick), 2 plays, 5 yards, 0:48, NU 7-0
NU - 8:53 - Henery 47 FG, 7 plays, 31 yards, 3:08, NU 10-0

Second Quarter (NU, 23-0)
NU - 11:57 - Rex Burkhead 5 run (Henery kick), 7 plays, 82 yards, 3:41, NU 17-0
NU - 8:25 - Henery 50 FG, 7 plays, 14 yards, 2:26, NU 20-0
NU - 0:35 - Henery 41 FG, 12 plays, 44 yards, 6:07, NU 23-0

Third Quarter (NU, 33-0)
NU - 10:07 - Henery 22 FG, 11 plays, 41 yards, 4:53, NU 26-0
NU - 3:39 - Niles Paul 74 pass from Lee (Henery kick), 6 plays, 89 yards, 3:12, NU 33-0

Fourth Quarter (NU, 33-0)
NU - 10:07 - Henery 22 FG, 11 plays, -1 yard, 1:21, UT 10-9

Final: #20 Nebraska 33, #22 Arizona 0
Attendance: 64,607
Time of Game: 3:16

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The Huskers hoist their first ever Holiday Bowl Championship Trophy in San Diego.

A Late Holiday Gift from Nebraska's Offense: Some Swagger for 2010 Title Run

Randy York's N-sider

SAN DIEGO - Congratulations to at least 30,000 Nebraska fans who gave up some Christmas presents and withdrew some major cash from their treasured savings accounts, so they could spend those last precious days of the decade in a place where it's never supposed to rain - Southern California.

Nice move.

Good timing.

You saw history made here Wednesday night at Qualcomm Stadium - Nebraska's first shutout in its storied 46-game bowl history and the first shutout ever in the Pacific Life Holiday Bowl, an annual event known for explosive scoring and loud cannon shots. And just for the record, it really was the first time it rained in 32 Holiday Bowls.

But no one really cared because the Huskers steamrolled 20th-ranked Arizona, 33-0, in a game that really never was close. Nebraska scored the Holiday Bowl's quickest ever touchdown, 95 seconds after the game started ... and the Huskers were the ones who kicked off!

Apparently, they were also the ones who were ticked off because they had some emotional ammunition from their head coach, who indicated that the Wildcats, among other things, didn't respect their talent.

"Thanks to all of our great fans for coming out and supporting us here ... I just want to say that Nebraska's back, and we're here to stay," Husker Head Coach Bo Pelini said, hoisting the Holiday Bowl trophy after becoming NU's first head coach ever to win his first three bowl games.

No surprise there, especially when you read all the other interesting late-season defensive milestones from Pelini-coached teams.

But here's the best thing about the whole night: Against the U of A, which was wearing special white uniforms to match its new white helmets instead of its customary blue helmets, the Huskers found something they hadn't seen or felt since the non-conference season. And it's something they will need to make a serious run for a national championship in 2010 - some real, honest-to-goodness offensive swagger. It may not have stopped the rain, but it did stop the pre-game trash talk.

Beating the Wildcats with the Wildcat Formation

Talking, stalking, you name it. The Wildcats were trying to gain every possible psychological edge, so it was only fitting that the Huskers played a great game instead of talked about one. Speaking of irony, is there any better way to beat a Wildcat than with the Wildcat?

"Our new Wildcat formation was huge," said Husker Tight End Coach Ron Brown. "We never really got to it for the Texas game because we needed longer reps, and the bowl game gave us that opportunity. Rex (Burkhead) is just a natural at it. He ran it when he did some quarterbacking as a junior in high school (at Plano, Texas)."

Burkhead's 89 rushing yards were pivotal on direct snaps from center. The Huskers used the new formation on their fourth offensive series and were able to keep the Wildcats guessing the rest of the way because they were able to read Arizona's defensive tendencies to just the second spread formation team it faced this season (Pac 10 Champion Oregon was the other).

"This is what we want to do. We want to be a team with a ball-control passing attack that is able to take shots with a good play-action game and be a team that can spread the field and use 52 yards of space," Nebraska Offensive Coordinator Shawn Watson said. "If you make a defense defend 52 yards of depth, that's a lot, man. That's what we want to be, and that's what we will be. That's the way we recruited and how we're building our program."

And the timing couldn not have been better. Even though the bowl game is the milestone 10th win of the 2009 Husker season, it's really, in a sense, the official launch of the 2010 season, and that's why swagger is such an important word here.

There are all kinds of ways to define swagger - including many that are negative - but on Bo Pelini-coached football teams, it is viewed as a positive word. Swagger, Nebraska Football-Style, is how someone presents himself to the world and how he handles a situation. Yes, swagger can be shown in a player's walk, but that's supposed to represent triumph over fear, not puffing out your chest or assuming a bodybuilder pose.

Okay, maybe the Huskers stretched the lines of demarcation a time or two on Wednesday night, but you'd like to think it was more out of a sense of accomplishment and relief than any deliberate attempt to upstage an opponent.

Swagger Can Mean a Variety of Good Things

Stay with me on this, especially those who thought there was no hope for an offensive team that had difficulty making a first down in the Big 12 Championship. Swagger is often the result of moving with confidence, sophistication and well, just being cool.

Here's the real payoff. Swagger, Nebraska Style, is simply to conduct yourself in a way that would automatically earn respect. If some situations can't deliver that no matter how sincere the effort, well, mistakes happen.

But let's really be honest. Wednesday night was a metamorphosis, a transformation if you will, and emotion was bound to spill over because an offense that wasn't going anywhere and had been given up as virtually comotose was suddenly everywhere, making yards on first and second downs, converting third downs, scoring touchdowns, making a record four Holiday Bowl field goals (from Mr. Reliable himself, Alex Henery), and, in the process, making everyone feel good, so they could laugh and be happy.

Admit it. You were as shocked by Nebraska's offensive performance against Arizona as I was typing on this computer late Wednesday morning when an earthquake, measuring 5.9 on the Richter Scale, moved the machine an inch or two while the 14th floor of the Marriott Marina Hotel shook so dramatically, you could actually feel the building sway.

That means those of you who have been so down on Nebraska's offense that you thought it would take an act of nature to change its course got just what you wanted on Wednesday night. The earth actually moved, and Nebraska's offense moved with it.

We forgive you for being shocked, but we're not fibbing when we tell you it did not surprise a single Nebraska coach or Husker player we talked to.

Suh and Pelini Both Saw it Coming

"I wasn't surprised at all because the offensive line and the quarterback have been beat up, and the running backs have been hurting, too," said Ndamukong Suh, the All-America defensive tackle and the Associated Press Player of the Year. "Some are still dinged up (including Zac Lee, who needs surgery on his throwing arm). But overall, they're finally healthy, and I knew they could play to their full potential. That's what they did and why they put up 33 points in three quarters - the kind of performance we were used to when they were healthy."

"We had a great plan," Watson said. "When we do something, it's all of us. I'm just a product of having four outstanding men in that meeting room. They're really creative. We've been through so much this year as a staff. The thing I'm probably most proud of is we never, ever, ever, ever ... ever question what we were doing nor did we nip or backstab. We knew what we had to do, so we joined our arms together, and we just did it. And then, when we had a chance and felt like we were at a point where we were healthy, we could get back to being us. That is what tonight was all about."

Lee threw for 173 yards, and he rushed, with purpose, for 65 more. Wide Receiver Niles Paul caught four passes for 123 yards. One was a 74-yard touchdown catch from Lee for Nebraska's longest play from scrimmage this season. The Wildcat formation produced Paul's touchdown because the safeties decided to attack, allowing the Huskers to put double moves on two corners playing too tightly.

Paul also had a 28-yard punt return and was named the game's MVP on offense. Safety Matt O'Hanlon got the ball rolling in the game's first series with an interception and a 37-yard return to the Arizona 4. He was named the game's MVP on defense.

Count Nebraska Defensive Coordinator Carl Pelini as one who "absolutely saw" Nebraska's potential to explode on offense on the same day as an earthquake.

"I think our offense is committed now that they're healthy," Carl Pelini said. "We had some physical bowl practices, and I said to Shawn Watson about a week ago: 'Man, if you guys play at the Holiday Bowl like you've been pounding against us, we're going to have no problem, and look what happened. Our offense is starting to get that swagger, too."

Watson agrees, but is eager to launch continued development of the receivers and the quarterbacks, which, in turn, will benefit the offensive line. "I can't wait. I'm excited," he said. "We have etched out where we want to be, and we took a big step tonight.

Swagger Can Take You from Good to Great

"I think the sky's the limit for how good this football team can be," Watson said. "We can be a really, really good football team. I can't wait to go back to work. The kids are excited. Our entire staff is excited. Once we were able to get back to being us, there was a whole new air in our practice, a whole new enthusiasm, a whole new level of detail. It became important to everybody."

Important enough to see swagger for what it really is - a momentum builder that can take a good team to a great team.

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HUSKERS IN THE NFL - WEEK 17...

Lincoln - A total of 20 former Huskers saw action in Week 17 of the NFL season.

Barrett Ruud had one of the top performances across the NFL, as the former Husker and five-year NFL veteran totaled a career-high 17 tackles, including 13 solo stops for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in a 20-10 loss to the Atlanta Falcons. On the year, Ruud finished with a career-best 142 tackles, tying him for second best in the league with Washington’s London Fletcher and Carolina’s Jon Beason, with all three trailing San Francisco’s Patrick Willis (152 tackles).

Former Husker defensive backs Zackary Bowman and Josh Bullocks each helped the Bears end the season on a high note with a 37-23 win over the Lions in Detroit. Bullocks totaled a season-high seven tackles, while Bowman added five tackles, an interception and two pass deflections. The interception was Bowman’s sixth of the year, which tied him for fifth in the NFL this season with seven other players. The league lead was help by four players, who each intercepted nine passes.

The Cardinals’ Ralph Brown capped the regular season with a career-best 80-yard interception return against the Packers in a 33-7 Arizona loss. The two teams will meet back in Arizona on Sunday at 3:40 p.m. on FOX in the first round of the playoffs.

In other action, Jacksonville Jaguars’ rookie Zach Potter started his first NFL game and caught the first pass of his career on Sunday in a 23-17 loss to the Cleveland Browns. Potter, who played defensive end at Nebraska, was recently activated by the Jaguars and moved to tight end. Potter was only targeted once in the game, catching the pass for three yards.

Huskers in the NFL Playoffs this Weekend
Philadelphia at Dallas (Sat., 7 p.m. - NBC)
Steve Octavien – Dallas (LB)

Green Bay at Arizona (Sun, 3:40 p.m. – FOX)
Ahman Green – Green Bay (RB)
Brandon Jackson – Green Bay (RB)
Ralph Brown – Arizona (DB)

New York Jets at Cincinnati (Sat., 3:30 p.m. – NBC)
Matt Slauson – New York (Guard)

Baltimore at New England (Sun., Noon – CBS)
Sam Koch – Baltimore (P)

- Scott Shanle (New Orleans), Carl Nicks (New Orleans) and Cody Glenn (Indianapolis) are also in the playoffs, but their teams have earned a first-round bye.

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2009 Holiday Bowl on DVD

Get the 2009 Pacific Life Holiday Bowl on DVD. Relive the action as the Huskers take on the Arizona Wildcats in a showdown in San Diego.

Buy Now $21.95



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HUSKERS CRUSH CATAMOUNTS...

Burlington, Vt. - Kelsey Griffin produced another monster performance with her fifth double-double of the season, scoring 25 points and grabbing a career-high 16 rebounds to lead No. 12 Nebraska to an impressive 94-50 win at Vermont on Monday night.

Griffin, a 6-2 senior forward and the reigning Big 12 Player of the Week, hit 10-of-16 shots from the field, including all five of her free throw attempts, while producing the highest rebounding total by a Husker in six seasons. She nearly notched her 25th career double-double in the first half alone, leading the Huskers with 17 points and nine rebounds at intermission. Griffin hit 8-of-12 shots from the field in the opening half to power Nebraska to a 42-29 halftime lead.

The Huskers, who finished off the first perfect non-conference season in school history by improving to 13-0, closed the first half on a 10-2 surge then put the Catamounts (11-3) away by opening the second half with a 16-2 eruption in the first five minutes to push the lead to 60-33.

In addition to Griffin's career-high rebounds, fellow senior Kala Kuhlmann tied her career-best with 13 points on a perfect shooting night. Kuhlmann hit 5-of-5 shots from the field including a career-best three three-pointers. Eight of Kuhlmann's points came in Nebraska's decisive runs in the first and second half.

Yvonne Turner added a strong effort with 11 points and five assists, while Cory Montgomery gave Nebraska four players in double figures with 10 points and four rebounds. Dominique Kelley added nine points and three assists, while freshman point guard Lindsey Moore added eight points, including a pair of first-half three-pointers.

Eleven different Huskers found the scoring column, as Nebraska produced the most points all season against the Catamounts, surpassing the 84 points scored by defending national champion and current No. 1 UConn in an 84-42 win in Storrs, Conn., on Dec. 3. It was Nebraska's 12th double-digit win of the year, including the eighth by 20 or more points.

As a team, Nebraska hit 58.9 percent (33-56) of its shots from the field, including 8-of-18 three-pointers. NU also hit 20-of-25 free throws, while dominating the glass, 47-25. NU committed just 12 turnovers against the Catamounts. The Huskers also held Vermont to just 28.1 percent (18-64) shooting from the field, including just 3-of-14 success from three-point range. UVM did hit 11-of-15 free throws and committed just eight turnovers.

Kendra Seto led Vermont with 18 points, while May Kotsopoulos added 16 points and Courtnay Pilypaitis pitched in eight points, seven rebounds, three assists and three steals.

Nebraska hit 56.3 percent (18-32) of its shots from the floor in the half, including 4-of-11 threes, while knocking down 2-of-3 free throws. NU outrebounded Vermont, 21-13, and committed just five first-half turnovers.

The Huskers held Vermont to 35.5 percent (11-31) shooting in the opening period, including 2-of-6 threes, while knocking down all five of its free throws. The Catamounts committed just four first-half turnovers. Kotsopoulos led Vermont with 11 first-half points, while Seto added nine points and four boards in 15 first-half minutes.

The Huskers open Big 12 Conference play when they travel to Ames to battle Iowa State on Saturday, Jan. 9. Tip-off between Nebraska and the 11-1 Cyclones is set for 7 p.m. at Hilton Coliseum with live radio coverage on the Husker Sports Network, including a free live audio broadcast on Huskers.com. A live video stream will also be available to premium subscribers of HuskersNside.
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HUSKER ROUNDBALL TEAM CATCHES FIRE IN SECOND HALF TO DEFEAT LIONS...

Lincoln - Sophomore guard Brandon Richardson matched his career high with 15 points and the Husker defense forced 20 turnovers as the Nebraska basketball team (12-3) ended in its non-conference slate with a 77-59 victory over Southeastern Louisiana on Tuesday night at the Devaney Center.

With the win, Nebraska tallied 12 non-conference victories, the third-highest total in school history and became the quickest team to reach the dozen-win mark since the 1990-91 squad did so on Dec. 30 of its record-breaking season.

Hot 3-point shooting in the second half allowed the Huskers to pull away from the Lions, with NU hitting an impressive 7-of-8 3-pointers in the game's final 20 minutes. The shooting exhibition guided Nebraska to its largest lead of 23 points at 75-52 with just under two minutes remaining.

Earlier, Southeastern Louisiana had closed Nebraska's double-digit lead to eight with 13 minutes left in the second half, before seniors Ryan Anderson and Sek Henry each knocked down a pair of treys to help the Huskers pull away from the Lions. Henry's 3-pointer at the 12:09 mark snapped a quick 7-0 run by the Lions that nearly cut a 15-point deficit in half. Ray Gallegos and Brandon Ubel added baskets before Anderson nailed the first of his second-half 3-pointers, pushing Nebraska back ahead by 15 with 8:27 to play.

Anderson finished the night with 14 points in 19 minutes, including 3-of-4 from downtown to move the Seattle native into sixth place on Nebraska's career 3-point field goal chart with 147. It was his team-high ninth double-figure scoring game of the season, as he leads the Huskers into Big 12 action with a team-high 11.4 points-per-game average.

Richardson scored 11 of his game-high 15 points in the first stanza to lead the Huskers to an 11-point halftime advantage. He had six of Nebraska's first 11 points as, after missing his first attempt from downtown in the opening seconds, he drained his next two long-range tries to push Nebraska out to an 11-8 cushion.

Southeastern Louisiana attempted 14 3-pointers in the first half, hitting six to stay within striking distance. Nebraska overcame the Lions' shooting as Richardson then gave NU a 24-15 lead with 7:04 remaining when Eshaunte Jones found him slashing to the basket for an easy left-handed lay-up.

The Huskers held the double-digit lead, 32-22, after Richardson hit his final of three first-half treys with four minutes left and they never looked back. Nebraska finished the game 27-of-59 from the field (46 percent) and 12-of-19 from 3-point range (63 percent).

Nebraska will hit the road for its league opener as it travels to Texas A&M this Saturday for a contest televised on the Big 12 Network at 3 p.m. Four conference teams are ranked in this week's AP Top 25 (No. 1 Kansas, No. 2 Texas, No. 11 Kansas State and No. 22 Texas Tech), while Texas A&M (27) and Oklahoma State (42) are receiving votes.

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DIARY OF A SNOW SHOVELER (thanks Shari!)

>
> December 8 - 6:00 PM
> It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!
>
> December 9
> We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had! Shovelled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplough came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!
>
> December 12
> The sun has melted all our lovely snow.. Such a disappointment! My neighbour tells me not to worry- we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our neighbour.
>
> December 14
> Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shovelling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplough came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shovelling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.
>
> December 15
> 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska , after all.
>
> December 16
> Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.
>
> December 17
> Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.
>
> December 20
> Electricity's back on, but had another 14 inches of the damn stuff last night. More shovelling! Took all day. The dam snowplough came by twice. Tried to find a neighbour kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.
>
> December 22
> Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white crap fell today, and it's so cold, it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to pee. By the time I got undressed, peed and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plough on his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think the butthole is lying.
>
> December 23
> Only 2 inches of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she, nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying.
>
> December 24
> 6 inches - Snow packed so hard by snowplough, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snow plough, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shovelling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the damn snowplough.
>
> December 25
> Merry fricking Christmas! 20 more inches of the damn slop tonight - Snowed in. The idea of shovelling makes my blood boil. God, I hate the snow! Then the snowplough driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a fricking idiot. If I have to watch "It's A Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to stuff her into the microwave.
>
> December 26
> Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.
>
> December 27
> Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he only charged me $1,400 to replace all my pipes.
>
> December 28
> Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. My WIFE is driving me crazy!!!
>
> December 29
> 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?
>
> December 30
> Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plough driver, and now he is suing me for a million dollars, not only the beating I gave him, but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his BUTT. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches predicted.
>
> December 31
> I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shovelling.
>
> January 6
> Feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?


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